Death is not from God
"God did not make death." This quotation is from the Book of Wisdom (1:13). Genesis tells us that death came into the world through sin. God did not make sin nor did he make death. God made us to have life, to have a full life, complete in the knowledge that he is our creator. And everything he made is good. God made you. You are good.
It may be that some of the things you do are not good. It may be that you are not living the full life that God intended for you. But it's not too late.
Turn to God. Ask him to show you where you are living the fullness of life he intends for you and where you are not living the fullness of life he intends for you. Be open to how he might speak to you. It may be in words or in pictures, in thoughts or in something someone else says to you.
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I started this website and blog on May 1, 2012. I am a Catholic who has been in ministry for many years. I first developed what I would call a close relationship with Jesus in the early 1970s. Ever since then I have been praying with people for healing and other needs. It is because I have seen so many of these prayers answered that I am so bold as to offer to pray for you individually through this website and phone line.