"Love keeps no record of wrongs," St. Paul tells in his first letter to the Corinthians (13:5). The verse comes in the midst of a description of what love is. Since our theme for a while is forgiveness, what does that have to do with forgiveness? What is unforgiveness but keeping a record of wrongs done to us? We can keep that record, reciting a litany of wrongs done to us ad infinitum. Or we can choose to forgive the person. I say "choose" because forgiveness is a choice and an act of the will. It does not depend upon our feelings finally being at a point where we can forgive. Forgiveness does not excuse what was done nor does it mean that what occurred was all right. It also does not give the person permission to hurt us in the same way again. For Reflection: In my experience of praying with people I have found many people say they have forgiven someone, but the hurt obviously remains. In that case it is best to forgive in detail. For example, "I forgive (name) for calling me stupid, for saying I was dumb, incompetent and worthless." This is different than just saying, "I forgive (name)." If we have forgiven someone and yet the hurt remains years later, we should forgive them specifically, in detail, for everything they said or did. The relief from the anger and hurt will come, usually quickly. Pronouncing the forgiveness aloud is helpful also. Let us pray. Father, when you forgive us you keep no record of our wrongs, you wipe the slate clean. Help me to pronounce forgiveness for those who have hurt me and to let the list of their wrongs be erased.
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There are two kinds of hurt in this life: the hurt we do to others and the hurt that others do to us. Both are equally important but Christians seem to pay more attention to the first than to the second. We brush off the hurt from others by saying things like, "Oh, it's OK" or "S/He didn't mean it" or "I understand now why s/he did it." With excuses such as these we tamp down the anger, we bury the harm that was done, and cause more damage to ourselves. On top of that we are disobeying God. Jesus didn't say to excuse others, he said to forgive them. He didn't say to bury the hurt, he said expose it to the light. Trying to ignore the harm done is not part of being meek or humble. It does not follow the Christian imperative to forgive, which means to deal with it. I bring this up because in the many years I have prayed with people, lack of forgiveness is often at the root of the problem. It is not the only root, but it certainly is a strong one. In the next few weeks we will look at forgiveness in the Scriptures, what they mean for our lives, and how we might set ourselves and others free from the captivity of our unforgiveness. For Reflection: Which person in my life irritates me the most (at home, at work, at school)? What are my pet peeves, and why? When do I find myself unable to do or say the good thing I want to do (see Romans 7:15). Let us pray. Jesus, Lord of Forgiveness, I think that I have done a good job of forgiving those who have hurt me. However, if there is someone or something I still need to work on, please show it to me today. "O King of all the nations, the only joy of every human heart" begins the sixth O Antiphon. Since we looked at the kingship and Kingdom of God in November and December, we won't spend much time on it today except to say that he is not the usual type of earthly king. The Israelites expected a king in the mold of David who would wage wars against their enemies. Isaiah says, "Every warrior's boot used in battle and every garment rolled in blood will be destined for burning, will be fuel for the fire. For to us a child is born, to us a child is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. Of the increase of his government and peace there will be no end. He will reign on David's throne and over his kingdom establishing and upholding it with justice and righteousness from that time on and forever" (Isaiah 9:5-7). Our God is not a God of war, but a God of peace. His weapons, our weapons, are spiritual because people are not our enemy. Our enemy, God's enemy, is Satan and his works. When we complete the defeat of Satan, full peace will be restored in the Kingdom of God on earth. Our weapons are prayer, forgiveness, reconciliation, healing, salvation, and the gifts of the Holy Spirit (see 1 Corinthians 13). All of these destroy Satan's stronghold and deliver people into the Kingdom of God. For God wants everyone to be saved and to join him in his Kingdom. For Reflection: Have I slipped into the mindset of considering any person to be my enemy? Let us pray. Jesus, you are Messiah, King, Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God and Prince of Peace. The government of justice and righteousness is on your shoulders. Change my mindset and give me eyes to see my true enemy. Let me be a warrior using your weapons to bring peace and justice. "Be strong, fear not! Here is your God, he comes with vindication; with divine recompense he comes to save you" (Isaiah 35:4). So often we read these words as part of a section describing the Kingdom and we don't necessarily concentrate on the meaning of "vindication" and "recompense." If we are vindicated for a crime, we are found not guilty. We are innocent. God sent his son Jesus to die for us that we might be declared not guilty, justified, innocent. As those who believe in Jesus and who appropriate for ourselves what he accomplished, we are vindicated, not guilty. The divine recompense was the death and resurrection of Jesus for the forgiveness of our sins. The debt owed because of our sins has been paid. There is no mortgage on our lives. That's not to say that we don't need to be sorry for our sins against God and others. Repentance is still necessary. But what we owed God, the amount due, was paid in advance. Jesus "picked up the check." For reflection: Have I been thankful for this great gift of vindication? Is there someone in my life who needs to hear "not guilty" from me? Let us pray. I will praise you, O Lord, among the nations; I will sing of you among the peoples. For great is your love, higher than the heavens; your faithfulness reaches to the skies. Be exalted, O God, above the heavens, and let your glory be over all the earth" (Psalm 108:3-5). Monday we spoke of the diplomatic mission of Kingdom ambassadors. The message of that mission is reconciliation with God, with ourselves and with others. For whatever reason, Christians have not yet completed that mission. We are not alone in this mission, as no ambassador is alone. We have the full faith and credit of the Kingdom of God behind us. We have Jesus behind us. He promised, "I am with you always" (Matthew 28:20). We have the Holy Spirit behind us. "I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Counselor to be with you forever -- the Spirit of truth" (John 14:16). For reflection: Many people will be gathering with family this week. It is often our families with whom we most need to be reconciled. Can we humble ourselves and be the first to say, "I'm sorry. Will you forgive me?" Let us pray. Jesus, there are people in my family whom I have hurt. Please open the door and help me to say, "I'm sorry. Will you forgive me?" Kingdom ambassadors have a message from Christ to give to all the representatives and the governments of the world: reconciliation. An ambassador is never sent by the head of her government to the head of another government without a message. That message is reconciliation. Christ has reconciled us to himself (not even counting our sins against us). And now we, as his ambassadors, are called on to take that message to others. Christ makes his appeal through us. We are his spokesmen. We are the people he trusts with his message - be reconciled to God (2 Corinthians 5:17-21). What better message is there than to be able to tell people that God loves them so much that all he wants is to be in a good relationship with them. He won't even count their sins against them. Just come, be forgiven, be reconciled. It is not the model of any worldly king. A human king wants you to prove yourself worthy of forgiveness, prove your loyalty, prove yourself ready to die for king and kingdom. In the heavenly kingdom it is the other way around. The king died for us that we might be made worthy. The king died for us to prove his loyalty. The king died for us that we might be forgiven. He wants us to sit in the heavenly places with him. For reflecti0n: Christ says to us, "Come up. Come up out of the muck and the mire. Come, be reconciled. I have so much more for you. Won't you join me?" Let us pray. My King and my God. (As we watch the video of women joyfully dancing to "King of Kings and Lord of Lords", let us consider with whom we can share the good news of reconciliation this week.) I was working on Capitol Hill when 9-11 happened. I could see the smoke rising from the Pentagon. Rumors were rampant that morning about what was going on, and, of course, we had no concept of people doing something like that deliberately. What does this have to do with our recent theme of praying for and forgiving our enemies? Even enemies such as these need to be forgiven. We are commanded by Jesus to forgive all and to leave the vengeance to God. Whether it is men who fly planes into buildings or fire bullets into schools, or who hold three women captive for years. Whether it is presidents and generals who lead us into war, or drug traffickers and human traffickers, pedophiles or identity thieves, we must decide to forgive them. Having forgiven them, we must love them and pray for them. As I said earlier this week, it is one of the hardest things for a Christian to do. For reflection: "Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited. Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: 'It is mine to avenge; I will repay,' says the Lord. . . . Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good" (Romans 12:14-21, also see Leviticus 19:17-18, Deuteronomy 32:35, Proverbs 20:22). Let us pray. Once again, Lord Jesus, I come to you for help. There are so many people who have not hurt me directly but I have judged them anyway because they have hurt people I know, or they have hurt my country, or they have become notorious for the things they have done. I want to forgive them. I do forgive them. I forgive them as you have forgiven me - fully, completely and without reserve. They are not mine to judge. You alone know their hearts and minds and why they did what they did. I place all of these people (name their names if possible) in your hands, Lord. They belong to you, not me. The prayer of Ananias for his enemy Saul was very effective. Within a few days Saul had completely changed his mind and the focus of his life. He went from a persecutor of the followers of Jesus to proving that Jesus is the Christ (Acts 9:19-22). That was one powerful prayer that Ananias prayed. It not only changed Saul, but also changed the history of Christianity through Saul's conversion. Our prayers for our enemies can be just as life-changing. It reminds me of the passage in the letter of James which reminds us to pray in all situations (James 5:13-20), assuring us that the prayer of the righteous is powerful and effective. For reflection: There may be enemies in several areas of my life - family, work, church, nation. For whom is God asking me to pray today? Let us pray. Dear Jesus, please bring to mind all for whom I need to pray. . . . I forgive them for what they have done. I set them free of my judgment. I ask you to bless and heal them in whatever way they need and to draw them closer to you. What famous person stood by as Stephen was stoned? Saul, also known as Paul, was there giving his approval to what was happening. Later Paul was authorized to search out adherents of the new sect that followed Jesus and have them arrested. In his own mind, Paul was righteous in what he was doing. He was trying to wipe out what he saw as Jewish heretics and put an end to this threat to Judaism. Paul was sincerely wrong. Yet Paul was forgiven by Jesus, not just for adding his thoughts to the stoning of Stephen but also for actively persecuting the early church. Jesus intervened in Paul's life to point out his error and bring him to repentance, forgiveness and conversion. (The miraculous story is recounted in Acts 9.) Paul was forgiven for what he failed to do (stop, or even protest, the killing of Stephen) and for what he did (persecuting Jesus' followers). This event became the touchstone of Paul's life. He knew that if he, with all he had done and failed to do, could be forgiven, anyone could be forgiven. For reflection: On Friday we considered what people had done to us for which we needed to forgive them. Today let us think of what people should have done for us but they did not do it. Let us forgive them for their neglect. Let us pray. Holy Spirit, please bring to my mind those whom I need to forgive who did not do for me what they should have. I want to forgive them with your help. Particularly, help me to forgive those who thought they were doing the right thing. Shall we glean one more lesson from Stephen? Forgiveness. Stephen managed to forgive his attackers even as he was being stoned. We can't overemphasize the importance of forgiveness in the Christian life. Look at the people Jesus forgave: the man lowered through the roof (Matthew 9:2-8), the adulterous woman (John 8:3-11), the woman who anointed his feet with oil (Luke 7:47-50), the criminal on the cross (Luke 23: 39-43), the people who crucified him (Luke 23:34), and Peter, for denying he knew Jesus (Luke 24:34 and John 21:15-19). And that's not counting the number of times Jesus talked about it - most famously when he told Peter we must forgive 70 x 7 times (Matthew 18:22) and in the Lord's Prayer (Matthew 6:9-15). In the experience of my own life and in the lives of those with whom I pray, I find that forgiveness is key to healing. Forgiveness brings healing of our spirit and soul and it opens the pathway of healing in our bodies. Forgiveness sets us free. The more specific we can be, the better. Saying, "I forgive my sister" is not as effective as saying, "I forgive my sister for (1, 2, 3, 4, 5 . . . )." And the hurts of early childhood have ramifications throughout our lives if we don't forgive them. Forgiveness is a decision, an act of the will. It is not an emotion. It does not say that what the person did to you is OK. It is making up your mind to forgive even though the person hurt you. For reflection: Have I truly forgiven my family for the myriad of things that happened between us? Can I decide to forgive today? Let us pray. Holy Spirit, please bring to my mind the incidents of my childhood for which I need to forgive someone. I want to be free of the pain and the hurt. |
AliceI started this website and blog on May 1, 2012. I am a Catholic who has been in ministry for many years. I first developed what I would call a close relationship with Jesus in the early 1970s. Ever since then I have been praying with people for healing and other needs. It is because I have seen so many of these prayers answered that I am so bold as to offer to pray for you individually through this website and phone line. Archives
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